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Community => General Chat => Topic started by: Databits on December 06, 2005, 03:45:36 PM

Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Databits on December 06, 2005, 03:45:36 PM
I found this to be quite amusing:

QuoteFrom a strictly mathematical viewpoint,
What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.

How about achieving 103%?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26,

then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and,

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

and, look how far ass-kissing will take you:
A-S-S--K-I-S-S-I-N-G

1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can then conclude with mathematical certainty that: While Hardwork and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, Bullshit and Ass-Kissing will put you over the top!
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Aetre on December 06, 2005, 04:32:14 PM
Meh, I still like my method of S-T-I-C-K-I-N-G--I-T--T-O--T-H-E--M-A-N.

217%, baby.
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Lei on December 06, 2005, 08:31:21 PM
you're my hero :)
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Xepher on December 06, 2005, 09:39:29 PM
Antidisestablishmentarianism!

1 14 20 9 4 9 19 5 19 20 1 2 12 9 19 8 13 5 14 20 1 18 9 1 14 9 19 13 = 307%
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: dragyn on December 07, 2005, 01:48:52 AM
I'll figure one of these out later, in the meantime, I'll just mention that you misspelled "achieve" as "achive".

Yeah.
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Databits on December 07, 2005, 02:36:32 AM
So I did... lol, normally I take care to watch my spelling... but normally in the body not the topic titles. :P
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: tickyhead on December 07, 2005, 03:41:41 AM
A-S-S-A-S-S-I-N-A-T-I-N-G--T-H-E--C-O-M-P-E-T-I-T-I-O-N

1+19+19+1+19+19+9+14+1+20+9+14+7+20+8+5+3+15+13+16+5+20+9+20+9+15+14=324%

works for me. :cool:
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: thefemnazi on December 07, 2005, 08:25:19 AM
SPECIAL EDUCATION TEACHER
19+16+5+3+9+1+12+5+4+21+3+1+20+9+15+14+20+5+1+3+8+5+18= 217%

uh huh, sounds about right.  ;)

HARMONY
8+1+18+13+15+14+25= 94%

More proof I'm not all there.
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Gwyn on December 07, 2005, 03:50:16 PM
I'm going to do one for "sleeping with your boss" but I haven't gotten around to it yet :p
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Databits on December 07, 2005, 04:16:53 PM
You all know that even if you're right in a situation at work doesn't mean that your boss thinks you are, so look at what you can accomplish by...

S-W-A-L-L-O-W-I-N-G--Y-O-U-R--P-R-I-D-E

19+23+1+12+12+15+23+9+14 + 25+15+23+20 + 16+18+9+4+5 = 263%



There's no surprise here, since everyone knows that most managers and supervisors are really good at...

B-E-I-N-G--AN--A-S-S-H-O-L-E
2+5+9+14+7 + 1+14 + 1+19+19+8+15+12+5 = 131%



And considering all the problems with people slacking... maybe it has something to do with many people just not...

H-A-V-I-N-G--C-O-M-M-O-N--S-E-N-S-E
8+1+22+9+14+7 + 3+15+13+13+15+14 + 19+5+14+19+5 = 196%
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Miluette on December 08, 2005, 08:57:22 AM
Yay for BS! Yay!

Normal methods will never get you there!
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Ashley_Rose on December 08, 2005, 08:51:27 PM
A-S-H-L-E-Y

1+19+8+12+5+25 = 70%....

I lose, Spock, I lose.
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: thefemnazi on December 09, 2005, 03:25:24 AM
PULLING A MONICA
16+21+12+12+9+7+1+13+15+14+9+3+1=133%

I purposefully dated this comment so that anyone who is too young to get it will not understand what the heck I'm talking about.
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Miluette on December 09, 2005, 03:41:03 AM
I wonder if I'm too young... (19) 'cause I get it.
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: thefemnazi on December 09, 2005, 05:52:57 AM
I say, if you get it, you're old enough.  It's far enough in the past that you have think and make a connection...or remember.
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Xepher on December 09, 2005, 11:26:50 PM
But I'm 24 and don't get it! I'm gonna guess it's some pop culture reference to some song or show I've never heard/seen... Wasn't there a monica on "Friends"?

Or wait, did you mean something about this? http://www.ozyandmillie.net/1999/om19990428.html
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: dragyn on December 10, 2005, 12:17:43 AM
Yeah, I'm pretty sure she was making reference to the same thing as Ozy and Millie was.
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: thefemnazi on December 10, 2005, 06:20:40 PM
Awww, you're so adorable, Xeph.  Tell me, do you believe that whole "a cigar is just a cigar" bit?

dang, I'm a mean person.
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Xepher on December 10, 2005, 09:37:50 PM
No, sometimes a cigar is just nasty!

As for "adorable" See, I don't keep up with current events or pop culture. I figure if something's REALLY important news, it'll end up on the BBC eventually, and if it's american news they bother about on the far side of the planet, then maybe it's worth reading. As such, I rarely have any idea what people are talking about when it comes to current events.

As for lewinsky... that's "Pulling a lewinsky" not "pulling a monica." :-)
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: Aetre on December 10, 2005, 09:41:22 PM
i get my news from msnbc. it's funny because they're incompetent. plus, their only "bias" is pro-corporate, and i'm an econ major, so that's cool with me.
Title: How do you achive over 100%?
Post by: thefemnazi on December 11, 2005, 02:05:24 AM
Quote from: XepherAs for lewinsky... that's "Pulling a lewinsky" not "pulling a monica." :-)
I didn't know how to spell lewinsky off the top of my head.