News:

The anti-spam plugins have stopped being effective. Registration is back to requiring approval. After registering, you must ALSO email me with your username, so that I can manually approve your account.

Main Menu
Menu

Show posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.

Show posts Menu

Topics - ren_pii

#1
Hopefully... this is in the right section... right?

Just wanted your input on how to you would advertise a webcomic, manga, strip etc without paying money for ads.
#2
is there any place on xepher.net where I can manage my site without downloading a ftp program? *totally lost right now* Sorry.  :-\
#3
General Chat / Good Movies
March 18, 2007, 09:07:15 AM
I can post this here right? You don't seem to have a section to talk about movies, tv shows or whatever... but I just wanted to post it here. Pretty general topic anyway. Move it if you feel it's out of place. (Or if there's an existing topic... sorry I made a new one...)

So I just wanna talk about movies... whatever you think is worth-watching.

So let me ask you this... is "Hannibal Rising" a good movie? Has anyone seen it? I heard it didn't give justice to its previous movies... but as a girl... and for the sake of Hannibal being portrayed as a sexy teenager... I can't help but want to watch it. (The other movies were pretty good too... I only saw Red Dragon and Silence of the Lambs though.)

Also... any Battle Royale fans? I read and watched both the novel and movie... and even though the novel is better, I enjoyed watched the movie... just cuz... most of the characters were played by sexy actors... haha.... CURSE my fangirlism!
#4
Writing / Poetry Journal
March 11, 2007, 05:49:40 AM
These are just a bunch of poem I made for my poetry journal in English. The teacher gave me 11/10 for all... wierd. He might have just added an extra mark by accident... but I'm not gonna ask him about it just in case he changes it.

---

QuoteFaith

He noticed, watched and studied her
He had for a long time.
But this girl no more than average,
never knew of his spying eyes.
No, she could not even see him...
that ghost who knew her better than words.
A phantom who lurked in the shadows;
She never knew of his stalking ways.
Even in the afterlife,
he did not want to move on to heaven
because staying by her was all he wanted... and needed.
Then this girl who forgot all about him
grew up, got married, and had children.
But patiently waiting... he stayed by her,
through all the hardships of her life.
She aged more and more while he stayed in his childish form,
and the moment she was about to close her eyes in eternal rest,
Her cold, trembling hands reached out to him and she said,
"I'll finally get to see you, my only true love"
---

QuoteInsomnia

Another late night...
the ceiling calls out to me.

Wide-eyed, I see something lurking in the darkness.
Another illusion?

The sheets are crumpled, pieces clutched in my hand.
Images surface from the blankets.

I can't help the fact that I'll always hear those voices;
Waking me up throughout the night.

I'll never stop thinking about you, because knowing
I hurt my beloved keeps this fellow awake all night long.

Forgive this fool,
the sleep deprived one.

Calling me late this misty night,
I stay up late... eyes open wide.
---

QuoteMurderous Heart

Slowly, surely, in the end you will kill me.
Not with instruments of destruction,
Not by your own hands,
but your heart...
will kill me.

A bit crazy, yes?
That I notice you,
Even in a crowd, no, sea of people.
It hurts to say,
that even you are not worthy of my affection.

So please, take the time to figure it out!
I cannot stand being trapped in this cage
specifically designed by you.
Trying to pry my way out only hurts me;
Such a devious trick played by you.

The hours and days I spend for you
are a waste of valuable time and unrequited effort,
Because in the end
You will kill me...
with your heart.
---

QuotePhantom

Maybe you don't care
Maybe you can't even see me
But I'm there-
watching you
Actually I know you can't see me
and that's why loving you is so painful
You can't love me if you don't even know I exist
All I can do is love you from afar,
My precious.
Invisible... that's what I am.
I'm just a ghost to you.
Literally, I am.
---

QuoteThe Artist

Everyday she drew,
on paper, on the walls,
on the chalkboards in school, on backs of buildings,
and even on her own body.
Everything that came into reach, she drew.

The adults asked her,
"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
But she ignored them, living in her own little world, by her own rules.

It was as if, everything drawn on canvas came to life.
What was better than living in a world of self-perfection?

One day, she met someone.
Someone called a "friend"
She drew that friend a picture
without using pencils or paper or paints or crayons.

That perfect medium she used was her heart.
She took out her glass heart and gave it to him
He thanked her, taking it with him.

The next day, he gave her heart to another
who shattered it to pieces.
Now this girl draws for the rest of her life
without a glass heart.
---

QuoteThe Walls tell the Truth

On the walls,
they crawl.
I can see them
as they watch me.
They're mocking me, begging me, wanting me...
As my soul calls out to them.
The walls painted with red written words,
“I think I love you
#5
General Chat / how to deal...
January 23, 2007, 06:44:21 AM
with those oh-so-bitchy-friends. YESH! I am bringing my problems to the forum and am complaining about it. I need a place to rant a little. Sorry dudes. O_O It's one of those teenage girl problem things.

So yeah... what would you do... if you had to deal with an uncooporative "friend" and even if you wanted to stop being this person's friend... you couldn't cuz they happen to have the same friends as you so you'll have to deal with that person anyway.

Anyway.. what I REALLY wanna do is break this person's legs and torture her until she stops being the slut she is. Unfortunately for me, girl world happens to be a little different then psychopath world. Ohh... ;_;

For guys... I heard if they don't like a certain dude... they'd just shun(sp? oh well) him from the rest of the group.

So yeah... feel free to share any stories or opinions with me. Just don't think I'm the bitch because... I DESERVE A TIME AND PLACE TO RANT! AHH!!!! >__<
#6
Applications / Heart, Mind, & Soul
December 20, 2006, 07:53:03 AM
I'm just gonna say this plain and simple: I need a new host for my "personal" art site. I want a new host for my art site... *sigh*

Atspace isn't working for me. I find it really tedious to update my site. I've considered applying to xepher.net in the past, but... I really wasn't sure if I could hosted. (I mean for me... it's hard to believe that unlimited webspace hosting actually exists!) But here I am... trying. So... bear with me please.

Here is a sample of my art site now: http://heartmindsoul.atspace.com/ (I haven't updated it with my recent art so... *ahem*)

Yes, you'll probably all groan and say "it's another anime art site." Well, yes... 80% of it is... for now. Believe it or not... I'm in the phase of "exploring new art styles". I have a few realism pieces, although I'm still kinda trying it out. I'd post traditional artwork/sketches if I still had a camera. Ah yes, and my site... well... it won't really have comics, although I do have a webmanga if you'd like to see that: http://digital-dust.net/educen/

I'm also planning to maybe put some short stories, photography (when I get a new camera), and poetry... if that's allowed.
If I get hosted... I might just throw away my older junk artwork and start fresh. (I'll probably make a new layout too since I'm not satisfied with the one I have now)


Ok... so for my username I want it to be: heartmindsoul and my email is shansterz@gmail.com.

Although I don't update my art site now, you probably won't have to worry about me "dying" since I don't think I'll ever stop drawing... unless someone assassinates me or I die of an uncurable illness. Heh...

Hmm... and... well if you're still wondering why I should get hosted, well, I'm a nice person! I don't bite! See? -> ^_^;;; *sweatdrop*


[EDIT]
Although I've never really been good at tests... I'm really to take this so-called "Challenge". I'd like to hear your opinions on whatever.
#7
Writing / Short Story: In the Devil's Mind
December 20, 2006, 12:51:00 AM
This is a story I made for writing class. Not the best story in the world, but I had to do it. Tell me what you think of it. Please note that I'm not a professional at writing... so please don't flame me or anything if you think the story sucks... >_<

QuoteIn the Devil’s Mind


“Where were you last night?"  The female nurse faced the young male doctor who stood before her. “You were going to check up on that young girl, remember?"

“Ahh… yes… I forgot…" His crystal blue eyes turned away from her, ashamed to admit he hadn’t shown up because he had taken a bit of a break outside to have a smoke. He flicked his coal black hair, with his pale hands sheltered in the pockets of his white lab coat. “I suppose I’ll have to go and see her right now, then?" The mysterious doctor walked away before the nurse could answer.

It was a quiet and deadly silent hallway. Only the sounds of his echoing footsteps were heard. The walls, the tiled floor, the doors, were all white. There were no windows anywhere. Such a lonely atmosphere, he thought. Rarely any people came or knew of this part of the hospital since it was a desolated area where only special-case patients were treated. Finally, at the end of the hallway, he reached a door that had a strange aura emerging from the inside. Turning the brass knob, he opened the door to a room for 6 patients, but only one occupant inhabited it.

By the window was a bed with a young girl playing with her dolls on it. She had long black hair that matched the doctor’s, and a pretty left eye that resembled his own. Her right eye was covered with a white eye patch with a picture of a blue bunny on it. She was childish for her age, liked to wear her hair in pigtails, and was attracted to collecting dolls. So far her collection consisted of 52 dolls. She was like a porcelain doll, dainty and fragile like glass. The 8 year old turned around, and smiled at him. The doctor approached her slowly with an expressionless face.

“Doctor Juros!" Jumping off the bed, she gave him a quick hug.

“How are you feeling today, Aki?"

“I’m not Aki, it’s Aya!" She smiled mischievously, holding him tighter. “Aki doesn’t want to come out right now. But I’m fine, now that you’re here! So you’re going to play with me because you promised, right?"

“Aya, I heard that you were a bit feverish last night, are you ok now?" He brushed aside her bangs, and felt the temperature of her pale forehead. Not was warm as yesterday, he thought.

“Please doctor! Play with me!" She pleaded him, tugging on his white coat.

“Where’s your mother? Did she come visit you?"

“No… she never does."  She held on to his coat, her head stayed low as if glued to the ground.
He felt a bit anxious at that response. He knew more about her than she did. The truth, he couldn’t tell her the truth. It would not only affect her, but his life, and his family’s life. Unable to respond, he looked at the door, wishing and hoping someone would open the door. Then he heard his name being paged on the PA system and used it as an excuse to leave the situation. He exited the room, leaving the agitated little girl alone in the room.

The secret that was kept from her, he knew it. If he were to tell her, her condition would become worst. She had suffered a lot already. Endless nights, her dreams interrupted by delusions and hallucinations. At her age, she already knew of the cruelty and selfishness of the world. Love was a word that had never been in her vocabulary. She thought the word was only existed in fairy tales. Every human was foolish and greedy, she thought. It saddened her deeply. Her mother hadn’t cared for her because she was too different, as if she wasn’t even human. She had thought that for a long time. The girl never knew her father. He was a mystery to her. So she attempted to replace him. But Juros knew who he was.

It was late that rainy Sunday night, not even the sound of the Mozart’s Symphony No. 40 could calm her down. The young girl had been rudely interrupted in her sleep by a nurse who was trying to give her an injection to ease the pain. The bunny eye patch shifted to her left eye, revealing an emerald-coloured eye in its place. Aki had woken up. Pissed off, she grabbed the nearest object to her: a copy of Shakespeare’s “A Midsummer Night’s Dream" and smacked it against her face. With a few moments distracted, Aki took that chance to grab the drug-filled syringe and easily injected it into the nurse’s right thigh. She let out a small wince of pain before passing out with foam started erupting from her mouth. Aki giggled mischievously at the sight of her.

“So that’s what you were trying to do, huh?" She crackled, kicking the fallen nurse. She switched her eye patch to the right.

“Aki, why’d you do that?" Aya said angerly. She placed one hand on her hip as the other switched the eye patch back to the left.

“She tried to kill us. Just like mommy did, remember?" Again, Aki changed the eye patch to the right.

“No! I don’t want to remember!" Aya put her hands on her head, as warm, stinging tears fell from her eyes. She collapsed to the cold ground and lay next to the dying nurse. It seemed as if the dosage was a tad too strong that it was enough to kill. The nurse wasn’t found until a couple hours later but it was too late. Several people came in to take away the body, leaving Doctor Juros to take care of the unconscious Aya.

She seemed to be in no physical harm, but mentally it seemed as if her condition had gotten worst. Nightmarish memories of her mother hitting her, to the point of knocking her out flashed back to her. Then she remembered when her mother had tried to kill her. How could anyone kill their own child? Although, she was in a coma, the tears never stopped flowing from her blue eye.

Doctor Juros gently rubbed her soft porcelain face, wiping away the tears from her eyes. “If Father wasn’t so irresponsible, you wouldn’t have to live like this…" He whispered softly. My poor baby half-sister, he thought. He remembered his father had gotten himself into an affair with another woman and never told his mother about it. To this day, she still didn’t know. He had kept that secret so well hidden from her. When Juros became a doctor, he swore to his father that’d he would care for his sister, even though they did not share the same mother. He never told her that he was her older brother. Aya’s mother worked at the local bar and never came home to care for her newborn child. She hated her own daughter and wished she never gave birth to her. Juros pitied his half-sister because of her abusive and unstable mother. Being an unloved child all her life, half of her wanted to be in mother’s life, but her other self wished she had never been born from an unfit mother. Eventually, the young girl became sick, and spent most her days in the hospital. In her mind, she was confused and indecisive.

She became two people: Aya and Aki. Aya was the old her, gentle, kind and playful. Aki was the new her that stayed dormant until she couldn’t take it anymore. Aki wasn’t sweet and playful like Aya. She was sadistic and did many cruel and mischievous things. She loved the darkness while Aya loved being in the light. She often conversed with herself openly, switching the bunny eye patch back and forth to distinguish which one was dormant.

“Remarkable…" Juros whispered as he stared at a photo of Aya when she was a baby. “She has one green and one blue eye." It was rare, for someone to be born with two different coloured eyes, he thought. He placed the photo back on the side table as he yawned and glanced at the time.  10:45 PM, it read. He laid his arms on the bedside and rested his head on them. It was going to be a long night.