Author Topic: How do you achive over 100%?  (Read 20525 times)

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Databits

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How do you achive over 100%?
« on: December 06, 2005, 03:45:36 pm »
I found this to be quite amusing:

Quote
From a strictly mathematical viewpoint,
What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.

How about achieving 103%?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26,

then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and,

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

and, look how far ass-kissing will take you:
A-S-S--K-I-S-S-I-N-G

1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can then conclude with mathematical certainty that: While Hardwork and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, Bullshit and Ass-Kissing will put you over the top!
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Aetre

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #1 on: December 06, 2005, 04:32:14 pm »
Meh, I still like my method of S-T-I-C-K-I-N-G--I-T--T-O--T-H-E--M-A-N.

217%, baby.
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Lei

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #2 on: December 06, 2005, 08:31:21 pm »
you're my hero :)
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Xepher

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #3 on: December 06, 2005, 09:39:29 pm »
Antidisestablishmentarianism!

1 14 20 9 4 9 19 5 19 20 1 2 12 9 19 8 13 5 14 20 1 18 9 1 14 9 19 13 = 307%

dragyn

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #4 on: December 07, 2005, 01:48:52 am »
I'll figure one of these out later, in the meantime, I'll just mention that you misspelled "achieve" as "achive".

Yeah.

Databits

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #5 on: December 07, 2005, 02:36:32 am »
So I did... lol, normally I take care to watch my spelling... but normally in the body not the topic titles. :P
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tickyhead

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #6 on: December 07, 2005, 03:41:41 am »
A-S-S-A-S-S-I-N-A-T-I-N-G--T-H-E--C-O-M-P-E-T-I-T-I-O-N

1+19+19+1+19+19+9+14+1+20+9+14+7+20+8+5+3+15+13+16+5+20+9+20+9+15+14=324%

works for me. :cool:
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thefemnazi

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #7 on: December 07, 2005, 08:25:19 am »
SPECIAL EDUCATION TEACHER
19+16+5+3+9+1+12+5+4+21+3+1+20+9+15+14+20+5+1+3+8+5+18= 217%

uh huh, sounds about right.  ;)

HARMONY
8+1+18+13+15+14+25= 94%

More proof I'm not all there.
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Gwyn

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #8 on: December 07, 2005, 03:50:16 pm »
I'm going to do one for "sleeping with your boss" but I haven't gotten around to it yet :p
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Databits

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #9 on: December 07, 2005, 04:16:53 pm »
You all know that even if you're right in a situation at work doesn't mean that your boss thinks you are, so look at what you can accomplish by...

S-W-A-L-L-O-W-I-N-G--Y-O-U-R--P-R-I-D-E

19+23+1+12+12+15+23+9+14 + 25+15+23+20 + 16+18+9+4+5 = 263%



There's no surprise here, since everyone knows that most managers and supervisors are really good at...

B-E-I-N-G--AN--A-S-S-H-O-L-E
2+5+9+14+7 + 1+14 + 1+19+19+8+15+12+5 = 131%



And considering all the problems with people slacking... maybe it has something to do with many people just not...

H-A-V-I-N-G--C-O-M-M-O-N--S-E-N-S-E
8+1+22+9+14+7 + 3+15+13+13+15+14 + 19+5+14+19+5 = 196%
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Miluette

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #10 on: December 08, 2005, 08:57:22 am »
Yay for BS! Yay!

Normal methods will never get you there!
And wasn't it you who told me,
"The sun would always chase the day"?

Ashley_Rose

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #11 on: December 08, 2005, 08:51:27 pm »
A-S-H-L-E-Y

1+19+8+12+5+25 = 70%....

I lose, Spock, I lose.
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thefemnazi

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #12 on: December 09, 2005, 03:25:24 am »
PULLING A MONICA
16+21+12+12+9+7+1+13+15+14+9+3+1=133%

I purposefully dated this comment so that anyone who is too young to get it will not understand what the heck I'm talking about.
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Miluette

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #13 on: December 09, 2005, 03:41:03 am »
I wonder if I'm too young... (19) 'cause I get it.
And wasn't it you who told me,
"The sun would always chase the day"?

thefemnazi

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How do you achive over 100%?
« Reply #14 on: December 09, 2005, 05:52:57 am »
I say, if you get it, you're old enough.  It's far enough in the past that you have think and make a connection...or remember.
"The world is not safe for my butt!" -Spongebob Squarepants

I worship Pantsless O'Clock.