Okay, the few art samples you provided are at least a bit interesting, but as you said, not enough to go on. So... Challenge it is.
For the first part, let's start with Diprotodon. Educate me (us) on it. While you're at it, some info for Procoptodon as well would be fun. And then imagine that you were going to be turned into monkey... well, let's make it any species of primate... which species would you prefer and why? Oh, and try and figure out why the phrase "Heisenberg was compensating" is funny.
Now I don't know what a Diprotodon or a Procoptodon is persay, I haven't ever heard of the word except that they would probably be some later era species of animal, like a Mastodon, the suffix "-don" kind of gives it that relation...so I'm going to do some research through wikipedia and paraphrase it on my own:
Diprotodon (not to nitpick but wikipedia redirected me from the Diprotodon page to the DiprotodonT page.)- Like I had mentioned above they were a later era marsupial during the times of the Mastodon that survived for about 1.6 million years until 50,000 years ago when they officialy became extinct. There have been a plethora of fossils found of this creatures in Australia primarily in grasslands and lower woodlands centered around the water which is typical behavior for an animal of its type.
What is important about the Diprotodon and is probably why I'm having to research this animal is because it was the largest marsupial to ever roam the Earth. An average sized Diprotodon were usually 2 meters talls and 3 meters in length however the only remotely close relative of the Diprotodon are Koalas or Wombats. Imagine that on a larger scale, a Diprotodon with it's immense height next to a short, stocky koala or wombat.
But how were the Diprtodon killed? How did they cease to exist? There are 3 theories but I myself would like to focus on the two main points: Human Hunting and Climate Change, which seem to be the reason for any extinction really.
The Diprotodon became extinct after the humans arrived on Australia about 50,000 years ago. This paticular theory is called the "Blitzkrieg Theory", like the Nazi Germany war machine the theory was named after, the humans took it upon themselves to hunt the Diprotodon native to Australia. Much like the Dodo bird or the almost nearly ex-endangered species the American Buffalo, the humans over hunted the Diprotodon. This theory is controversial however because it is seen as "simplistic" and "not enough evidence", but it makes sense, and that's about all you can make of things like that.
The second theory about climate is that Australia during the time that it broke off from Gondwana (the two supercontinents of Lurasia and Gondwana, Gondwana or Gondwanaland being the most southern of the two after Pangea broke apart.) was going through immense changes in rainfall amount. During the Ice Ages that broke out over the 1.6 million years they survived it never really caused any intense glaciation of Australia, instead long periods of cold and extremely dry weather which might have destroyed them in smaller amounts. However, critics seem to point out that large amounts survived many Ice Ages before and the peak period of climate change occured 25,000 AFTER they were extinct.
So how did the Diprotodon extinct? How many licks to the center of the tootsie pop? Are their aliens? If a tree falls in the middle of the forest and nobody is around to hear it does it still make a sound?
The world may never know, or they might just have the answers right above in two theoritical forms that make astounding and intellectual infrences on something that nobody could possibly know unless they were actually there to watch them die out. But you want to know my answer:
"President John F. Kennedy" Think about it.
(wow, after that one I think I'll only give a little bit about the Procoptodon. And I did NOT copy and paste any of this here is my refrence just so you know I'm trustworthy:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diprotodon I put my blood into that page...woooo I'm tired.)
The Procoptodon was also during the same era (Pleistocene) as the Diprotodon and lived in Australia. They were a species of short faced kangaroos that stood at a huge 3 meters (talking like 9 feet).
As for the monkey question definetly an Orangutan (not announce orangaTANG, you know, with the southern twang to it), I mean just look at those guys, they sit around, bad posture, shirt off with a hairy chest, you could imagine like a beer in one hand sitting in a reclining chair just relaxing. Being totally laid back in that way is definetly something I could do, they just look like animals that could kick back and not have a care in the world. Plus as a kid I guess I have always had a thing for Orangutans, I don't know why they just appealed to me over any other type of primate. The gorilla just seems too tough and bad ass going around throwing shoulders and starting shit with people, the chimp just seems to wild, like crazy, where he would find himself causing mass hysteria inside a hotel ("Dunstin Checks In" reference) and if they look better than me in people clothes that's a definite turn off, and any other monkeys of a smaller stature just seem really annoying, like that kid in class who is always chirping in his high pitched whiny prepubscent voice and you just want to punch him in his throat.
So orangutans, because I'm laid back, just real mellow, they seem to be that way. And I wouldn't mind some lanky arms, that would be bitchin'.
Why is "Heisinburg is compensating" funny? I would go with the President Kennedy theory this time too, but nobody likes a conspiracist. So here is my take on why it is without doing any research on Heisinburg:
Media brainwashing and the right timing with the use of the phrase.
-Media brainwashing because I mean that's what the media does to you, it tells you the people what is funny, maybe Heisinburg is compensating is meaningless but the media puts a dancing panda with it or a spinning flame wheel of doom going towards a castle of the French with them screaming in their crazy language about sausages and rice cakes and its an immediate classic. It would be all over the internet and a pop-culture icon, there would be "I Love the (insert year here)" show and there would be a whole ten minutes of it with multiple comedians screwing the the words and making their own little comments on that era. That is comedy right there. I mean I WOULD probably think that phrase is hilarious then. The media made you think it is.
-The right timing is always what makes something unfunny, funny. The right context too. I mean your not going to go to a math convention and pull that joke out to a bunch of algebra nerds, they'd probably kick your ass, and you wouldn't go to a funeral or a really banging party with booze and chicks and try to break the ice with that joke, I mean especially at a funeral. "Wow...Frank looks so peaceful, you know Jill, this got me thinking..." "What Steve?" "HEISINBURG WAS COMPENSATING!" "I'm sleeping with your bestfriend." It just can't work, you need timing, you need an audience who understands, who is Heisinburg? What does Heisinburg stand for? Who knows about him? Who would get the joke at the right time and with the right group of people? What is the right time? What is the right group of people?
That's it for the first part of the challenge for me, I hope you enjoy my answers, this took a good hour to write up and I'm quite tired, its around midnight and I'm totally going to crash.
Thank you Cleveland.
And Goodnight.
